Wednesday, September 4, 2019

Lean Horse 100 miler, questioning my motives


I start this race report with so much to say but yet so little. I struggle in my running life to find a balance between sharing all of the details of my experiences (as I am a coach), and yet somehow keeping some of my hobby private, sacred to me. Here is my experience at the Lean Horse 100 this year… one of the most beautiful events I have ever run.

The Lean Horse 100 miler is a 100 mile out and back course that takes place on the Mickelson Trail in the Black Hills of South Dakota. The race starts in Custer and goes almost to Deadwood before turning around and running back to Custer to finish on the High School Track. The race starts at elevation, approximately 5000 feet, and has a net gain of about 7500 feet over the 100 miles. The race also has a 50 mile, 30 mile, and 20 mile option. These are point to point.

Training:

Although Lean Horse starts at elevation and has a net gain of 7500 feet, I was not concerned about training for hills this year due to the railroad grade of the track. I did most of my training leaving from my house in Neenah, WI (flat as a pancake) and working a very strong run/ walk strategy. My Saturday long runs consisted of a 5 min run followed by a 2 minute walk and I would do this for between 18 and 22 miles. Sundays are strictly power hiking/walking days for me and these walks would last between 2 and 3.5 hours. Overall, I never broke 65 miles in a week and this strategy has worked well for me throughout the years. In my humble opinion (15 years of coaching athletes), most people are doing way too much running. I should also mention that I strength train 3 days per week, do yoga 1 to 3 times per week, and work on my running form until I am blue in the face. I use a Gymboss timer to time my run/walk breaks and a Timex stop watch to tell me when to eat. I do not use a GPS watch.

Prior to the race:

Greg and I got out to the Black Hills area about 5 days prior to the race and spent our time site seeing. There is so much to see and do in the area and I would highly recommend that if you do the race you spend some time before or after exploring the area. Due to the high rain that the Black Hills area received this year, everything was green and lush like it would be in the spring time. The only running I did the week before the event were a few 20 minute easy runs from the cabin we stayed at. We did hike quite a bit, but nothing that fatigued my legs.

The Race:

The race starts at 12pm on Friday which if I had to make one criticism of the event it was this. I am sure they have their reasons, but it meant that an early riser like myself spent hours twiddling her thumbs prior to the start.

The race starts at the Custer YMCA “downtown”. The field was small, maybe 65 athletes and there were very few women. I am used to this by now but this race seemed surprisingly under represented by females. My strategy was to start SLOW. I knew that the course would be deceiving…very runnable… and that could get someone in trouble early on. I set my run walk timer to a 3 minute run to a 2 minute walk… the race director said “go” and I pushed the start button on the timer.

The first mile or so is paved and then we made our way onto the crushed limestone of the Mickelson trail. I noticed early on that I was being passed by A LOT of people. “Am I going too slow”?... “Why are all of these people passing me”… “do they know something I don’t”… All of the voices that pop in your head. The experienced side of me knew to stick with my plan and let the others run their own race.

About 5 miles in… all at which are on a slight uphill… I caught my first glimpse of the Crazy Horse monument. This was just the start of the amazing scenery on the race course. A few miles later I came across Greg on his mountain bike. “Wow, all of these people are going way too fast this early” he said. I was so glad he made mention to what I was feeling. Onward with my run/walk I went.

Logistically it was tough to have Greg crew me or pace me on this run. We had brought the dogs with us and our cabin was 20 minutes south of Custer, in the opposite direction of the run. Greg and I both decided prior to the run that he would meet me at the 50k mark and then I would be on my own until morning. At the 50k mark Greg would hand me my headlamp and a coat and I had a drop bag of food at the turn-around. This was totally fine by me. I had done races crewed, un-crewed, paced, un-paced before. They all have their advantages and disadvantages and everyone has a system that works for them.

As I was running throughout the day I was marveling at the scenery but also dealing with some mental demons. You would think that with each additional race, an athlete would find the distance easier. I have found the opposite. My first few hundreds were “easy” per say. I was fueled by naivety, a little ego, emotional pain, and the drive to prove to others and myself that I could do these things. As I get older and wiser my motives have changed significantly and for whatever reason, that is what I focused on during the first 50k of Lean Horse. By the time I finally met Greg at mile 31 I was ready to be done.  “Why do I need to run any further, 50k is enough? Am I being selfish with all of this running and racing? What is my “why”?” All of these questions flooded my brain. I was in tears and pulled Greg aside. Like the wise man that he is, he listened and said nothing really. I was really hoping he would say something… give me permission to quit, tell me that I had nothing to prove… nope, not a word.  “Well, you look good. How are your feet? Let me get you some bug spray. I will see you in the morning”. Not at all what I wanted to hear from him but it was the tough love that I needed.

I don’t know what flipped my switch at that 50k mark, but I left the aid station crying and never once thought about quitting the rest of the race. The mind is a silly thing... A few miles outside of the aid station Greg surprised me on his bike. I know he wanted to make sure I was okay although he told me he wanted to bike up to a tunnel and then he was going to head back for the night. It was a morale boost for sure even though I knew I would be alone again for the next 50 miles.

The next section of trail from the 50k mark to Deadwood (at least what I could see of it) was breathtaking. We ran through a couple of old railroad tunnels, streams and creeks followed the trail, and the Black Hills were silhouetted by the sunset in the background. I ran mostly alone, following my 3 minute run/ 2 minute walk. My plan was to do this until the turn-around and then flip-flop the interval. Walk 3 minutes and run 2 minutes. I would do this until I couldn’t.

At some point… maybe around mile 45, I finally came across a running partner. The sun had set and my headlamp was on. Ryan asked if he could run with me as he hated running in the dark. I welcomed the company. We ran to about mile 60 or 65 together chatting the whole way. At mile 65ish Ryan picked up his pacer and I went on ahead. I kept with my run/walk.

 My nutrition plan was as it always is. Eat every 30 minutes, about 150 calories per hour. Alternate solid food with liquid/gummy/gel until about mile 50 and then see what the aid stations have. Usually at mile 50 I switch over to more savory food…things like potatoes, soup, chips, and tortillas. For some reason the aid stations lacked vegetarian savory food. The potatoes they had at the aid station were raw, and the tortillas contained cheese and meat. Now I am not blaming the race, rather my poor planning, but due to the lack of savory food I had to keep ingesting sugar. I believe that is why my stomach turned. By about mile 70, I was starting to deal with a terrible case of nausea. I have dealt with this before but typically for only a couple miles. I had to slow down. By mile 75 I was walking exclusively and by the time I saw Greg at mile 80 the only thing I could stomach was ginger ale and potato chips and not really much of that.

I sat down at mile 80 and told Greg to give me 5 minutes. It was early and it was cold. Up until then, my light wool running coat had kept me toasty throughout the 50 degree night but now the temps were in the 40s. I knew they would not stay there long but that in order to stay warm, I had to keep moving. Greg handed me my trekking poles and we agreed to meet at every aid station until the finish.

My nausea lingered and I got further and further behind on my calories. I was starting to feel a bit light- headed around mile 90 but noticed that as long as I nibbled on a bit of food every mile or so, I could keep it down and the sugar was like a little IV of energy. Just enough to keep me upright and moving.

Finally, the last aid station before the finish. I saw Greg once more and the friendly aid station volunteer shared with me that instead of the 5 miles I thought I had left, I actually only really had 4. This may sound trivial, but this news is HUGE in a 100 mile event. At this point the 20 milers were starting to come in so the trail seemed a little less quiet as they blew past me.

I kept looking behind me. The other pressure that I felt during this event was knowing that I was currently the 2nd place women. In fact, I knew this from the 50 mile point on. It is a very different feeling in a race knowing that someone might be coming to get you. With 1 mile to go, I pretty much knew I had it. and a little pressure came off a bit. Would some phenome come flying past me to take the title? I had to be okay with that because my lightheadedness would not allow me to run.

Finally the track, the final ¼ mile to the finish. The brain and body are amazing and funny at the same time. I saw the finish line and felt great. Greg and I ran the last little bit… I crossed… and then I INSTANTLY had to lay down. “That’s it” my brain and body said. “Now lay in the grass and don’t move.”

It took me 30 minutes of laying in the grass to finally stand up and walk to the car, belt buckle in hand. I had completed the Lean Horse 100 with a total time of 23:09 and a 2nd place female finish. If it were not for the stomach issues I probably could have finished in under 22 hours but it was still a personal record for me in the distance. I will take it.

What drives ME to run 100 miles over and over again? I no longer have to prove to myself or anyone else that I can do it and the emotional pain that I was medicating with endurance racing is gone. Maybe it’s the scenery, the people I meet along the race course, the demons I have to confront in the race, the ramen??? Or maybe it’s just the very simple fact that for some strange reason my body can do these things and for that very simple reason, I SHOULD.  I am not sure when I will figure out this question but for now I will continue to show up and learn from each experience.   

Tuesday, January 1, 2019

Tuscobia 2018, Ice and Inspiration



Photo Courtesy of Gregory T Photography
I am not a religious person, but I have always had some deep understanding that there are things in this world that are magical, beautiful, and beyond our understanding. Once and a while I feel in touch with this force, but only for moments at a time. Maybe this is what some call enlightenment, or awakening, and I am sure for some of the religious, it is getting in touch with God. Regardless of what you call it, I feel it during my time spent alone in the woods running, and I always feel it more during the Tuscobia Winter Ultra.

This report is not meant to be some sophisticated writing on the spiritual aspects of running, but I start with this intro so you understand why I write about Tuscobia. I run dozens of ultramarathons a year but very few inspire me to sit at my laptop and reflect on my experience. Every year Tuscobia does, it inspires me while at the same time humbling me.

For those unfamiliar with the Tuscobia Winter Ultra, let me give you the run down. The Tuscobia state trail runs between Park Falls and Rice Lake, WI. It is an all-purpose trail but mostly used by snowmobiles in the winter. It passes by sleepy towns with populations ranging from unincorporated to 8000 but mostly unincorporated. The trail is flat and straight with a few random hills and is tunneled by pine trees. Runners, bikers, and skiers can choose to participate in the 80 mile from Park Falls to Rice Lake or the 160 miler, from Rice Lake to Park Falls and back to Rice Lake. There is one check point about midway through for the 80 milers, and an extra check point at the turn around for the 160 milers. With little aid, racers must carry their required gear with them (see below). Bikers strap the gear to their bikes, runners and skiers usually pull a sled.  You are not allowed crews, or to accept aid from anyone other than another participant. You are allowed to visit gas stations, and restaurants along the way, but those are few and far between.

Every year Tuscobia seems to throw some new challenge to the racers. Last year saw temperatures around -18 at the start, dipping to -30 below at night (wind-chill not included). This year there was debate if there would be enough snow to cover the trail. The Thursday before the race left the trail covered in a slushy, rainy mess. This made it difficult for the 160 mile racers as it caused wet feet early on. As an 80 mile racer, I start a day later. The trail had firmed up but turned treacherous in some spots as it was covered in ice.
Jason and I happy at the start of the race!
 

Our 80 mile race started on Saturday morning at 10am. The temperature was about 10F which I might add is the PERFECT temperature for this sort of thing! Moisture management in winter ultras is key so I was testing out some new gear. Last year I made the mistake of getting wet early on and ended up layering clothing in an unhealthy way to get through the -30 degree night. This year my goal was to stay dry and I did. (See gear list below).

I always have a goal of finishing a race but on top of that I wanted to beat my time from last year. I had a strategy of hiking fast and whenever I saw a “no trespassing” post, road crossing, or any other man made trail marker, I would run 100 steps. This strategy did an amazing job of keeping my hiking pace up, keeping my core temperature regulated, and breaking up the repetition and muscle usage of always walking. I also had a goal of keeping a positive mental attitude and staying in the moment. I think that in ultras it is too easy to get stuck in a negative thinking pattern or to think ahead to the next aid station, finish line, or a hot shower after the race. I tried to stay in the moment as much as possible, and although I could not completely turn off the negative voices I was able to turn the volume down a bit.

The first 35 miles to Ojibwa, the one and only check point, went relatively fast. I spent some trail miles with my friend Jason and that helped pass the time a bit, but for the most part I was alone. I don’t mind the quiet time. I often get asked what I think about and to be honest, not much. Many minutes will go by when I don’t think about anything, but when I do think I try to reflect on the positive or to be grateful. This year I thought a lot about the people who are no longer with us, and about the people in my life who are going through tough times. I friend of mine just found out that her son will need a liver transplant, another ultra-marathoner died tragically this year in his early 20s. Although this doesn’t sound like a positive thought process it made me incredibly grateful to be out there in the woods on a cold winter’s day. What more could one ask for then health, and one more day to take in the beauty of the world.
A lonely biker leaving Ojibwa, Photo Courtesy of Gregory T Photography
 

Once I rolled into Ojibwa the task was simple, change socks, fill water, and go. Ojibwa is a very primitive stone building in a park, but it’s a welcome refuge when you have been out in the woods for hours. Surprisingly my clothes were not wet at all so I was able to zip in and out of the check point in 7 minutes. I was two hours ahead of my time for last year, so many of the people I came upon were 160 mile bikers. I would not have wanted to ride that icy course, kudos to them.

Now comes the 45 mile push to the finish. It can be a little daunting when you get to the check point and are not even half way there, but I tried to break the time up into two hour windows. Each hour is started with a “200 calorie bomb”. That’s the thing that never ceases to amaze me about the winter races. I need to eat just as much or more than the races that I RUN.  I am only walking through the snow, pulling a sled… how hard could it be? This year I separated my food into 200 calorie zip lock baggies so I knew I was eating 200 calories per hour and no less. I have found that I need a variety, I get sick of the same things. This year I packed my Mom’s Christmas cookies, fruit cake (my new favorite winter racing food), nuts, party mix, peanut butter protein cookies, and goldfish crackers, all foods I would not touch in real life!

The trail was very dark this year. The little sliver of a moon was always under cloud cover so I had to turn my head lamp on early. I typically like to travel without a headlamp except when a snowmobile approaches, but this year the darkness and the icy trail required some light. After leaving mile 35 I was alone except for the 160 mile fat bikes that would pass by offering a “good job”. My body from the ankles up was holding up fine, but I was experiencing some achilles and ankle pain, at least that’s what I thought it was. The discomfort in my ankles was concerning and I will never be a racer that will push the limit and wreck themselves just to finish a race. I also know that sometimes things work themselves out or don’t get any worse.  I decided that I would monitor the situation and re-evaluate my condition in Birchwood. Birchwood is a tiny town with a gas station roughly 20 miles from the finish. If needed I could call for a ride there. I didn’t want that at all.

I arrived in Birchwood at 2:45am, now 2.5 hours ahead of last year. I was able to keep a relatively quick hiking speed with my 100 steps of running mixed on when the trail was not icy. Everything in the town is closed at 2:45 in the morning but I needed to fill my hydration pack. Luckily, some volunteers from a club in Birchwood had pitched a warming tent with water, hot chocolate, and cookies. I guess they were getting sick of racers knocking on their doors in the middle of the night. It was like a little oasis and I filled my pack, said my “Thanks” and left. The temps were still staying pretty stable around 10 degrees so my water was not freezing. I always keep a Stanley thermos of hot water in my sled just in case I run out. To tell you how great that thing is, 2 days later I emptied it… the water was still warm even after a daylong race and another night in a cold car.

My ankles were not feeling any worse so I decided that I would press on and not worry about them anymore. Sometimes, the more you think about something, the more it bothers you. I sent a silent apology to my body for putting up with my shenanigans and marched on. There are a few steep rolling hills to deal with after Birchwood as the Tuscobia state trail merges with the Ice Age trail. Normally I would use this opportunity to gain some speed and run down the hills but they were all too icy. I found a path along the edge and tip toed my way down. The whole time my 30 lb sled wanted to dart down the ice, I had to brace myself to walk it safely along side of me.

Once you get through the hills the trail flattens back out and mocks you with mile markers. The last 9 miles to the 4 mile Wild Rivers trail that takes you to the finish, goes on forever. Mile 9, mile 8, mile 7… I tried not think about the time. Last year I was motivated by fear of the cold, this year I wanted to enjoy my experience and take in the beauty of the winter around me. Although there was not much snow the little there was blanketed everything in a sleepy quiet dream.

Finally the last 4 miles. I was met with a few flags signaling a turn and a nice man congratulating me on my journey. Where else would a random stranger hang out at 6:45am in the cold to cheer on someone he didn’t even know? The ultra-running community is incredible.
And...DONE! Photo Courtesy of Gregory T Photography
 

The last 4 miles are a victory lap. I was able to watch the sunrise, reflect on my journey, my year, and my life, and give Thanks. I literally said “Thank-you” out loud and cried for a minute or two. In that moment I was grateful for so many things, the Universe, God, my health, my friends and family, the running community… but mostly for this precious life.  I really hope I get to be here a long time, but just in case I don’t, I will pack as much life and love into my days as I can.
 
REQUIRED GEAR:

  • Sleeping bag – Mine is rated for -20 F
  • Bivy sack 
  • Sleeping pad- Thermarest
  • Stove.  I use an Esbit
  • Fuel – 6 extra Esbit Tabs
  • Firestarter -Waterproof matches
  • Headlamp- Foxelli rechargeable plus one spare headlamp
  • 3 individual flashing red LED lights + back-up batteries for each light- I use bike lights with lithium batteries, they do better in the cold
  • $30 cash
  • At least 20 square inches of reflective material- I use an elastic belt, see pictures
  • 3000 calories – Peanut butter and chocolate, if shit goes down I am going to be fat and happy
Additional Gear:
- Roughly 6000 calories, more than I need but better to be safe than sorry
-Stanley Thermos filled with hot water
-4 pairs of Smartwool hiking socks
-4 pairs of Injinji liner toe socks
-Trail toes foot lubricant
-Leuko Tape
-Altra Lone Peak Neo Shell mid 3.0 boots, 1 size bigger then I typically wear
-Ice Breaker Merino Wool Base Layers
-Ansilita Goretex shell pants that are 3 sizes too big but work great!
-2 fleece 2nd layers, only needed one
-Arcterix lightly insulated coat
-Minus 33 Merino Wool Liner Gloves, kept my hand warm until about 4 am
-Garneau Clamshell cloves
-Outdoor Research Alti mitts (didn't need them)
-3 Polar Fleece buffs, replaced when wet
-1 balaclava
-2 hats, only needed one
-1 pair of puffy pants, didn't need
-Mountain Hardwear ski jacket, didn't need it
-1 ginormous duffle bag
-Expedition sled
-military grade padded waist belt with carabineers and rope for the sled
-Chap-stick, Tissues, Cellphone, Caffeine tabs
-Nathan 2 Liter Hydration pack

All of this gear weighed in at 30lbs